I remember a couple of years ago I was having set back after set back. It took a toll on my peace of mind. I realized I was tired, really tired of the struggle. Not enough to harm myself, I realize I am too vain for that. I was just so overwhelmed it felt like negativity had taken a hold of me and was squeezing the life out of me. I wasn’t enjoying life, I was just trying to get through each day without another catastrophe or issue popping up. Some may have thought the issues were small, but small problems continuing over time can have an effect and honestly some of the problems were bigger than I realized.
Burdens were threatening to break me completely down and I remember crying and praying one night after my second job. I did this for a long time and then I stopped crying and just set in complete silence and breathed in and out for about 10 minutes. When I opened my eyes I felt calm. I went to sleep feeling better than I had felt in a while. I woke up the next morning and meditated again. I meditate regularly most mornings now because it brings me peace and calm, even if there is chaos around me.
I wasn’t giving up on life, I was giving up on allowing bad incidents to keep me from choosing Happy and Peace.